Dreams of the Red Wizards: 14 Jan 16

Trigger Warning:  Original Content, Two groups hating on each other, Cultural Appropiation of Sonic the Hedgehog’s Saturday Morning Cartoon, and an honest to god official Furry charcter.

I have just begun to fuck with this team. And I made it clear that they know it. I did it in three directions:

Item: The DM’s Guild

dms guild logoAs I listed in the previous post, the new Dungeon Master’s Guild is already a valuable resource for Dungeon Masters who are using the Forgotten Realms, even if it’s my hacked version. They have stat blocks for creatures that fill in the missing spaces of the Monster Manual, and when you start making your own customized encounters using your party’s levels to calculate the difficulty of the encounters.

There’s especially a document that has different kinds of dwarves I can use, which has…possibilities

Item: The Thunder Hammer Group

Yes, I know it’s an cheezy name, and yes, they did call me on it. It doesn’t change the fact that I intentionally made this group to be a pain in their asses.

As in the real world, where people who act like dicks should expect reprisals from opposing group, this party now has an equal and opposite response to their anti-dwarven bigotry. However, this isn’t a group of Twitter Crybullies: The Thunder Hammer Group consists of Dwarves who are very capable, willing, and even anxious to counter violence against their race in kind, out of little more than racial survival. (Think of Israel; they have nukes, and the intention to take out the rest of the Middle East with them. Say what you will about what they think of Palestinians, do you really want to provoke these psychos?) And they have their sights locked on the Fountain Head group.

They even announced their intentions with a wanted poster rewarding anyone who brings down the party a peg or two. (You ask me, I doubt they have the million PP award for each head of the party.) That was followed by several encounters of DM’s Guild supplemented Dwarven Encounters, one of which included a scene where the group burned down the farm and salted over the earth! Only Marcion (the drow alchemist) survived with all the 15 or some Super Potions he could carry.

You can say that these two groups have their upmost attention.

But that’s not all:

Item: Axel, the Cleric Bunny!

Artwork by Shoze @ DA

Last session, Axel was knocked out of commission by one of my supped up traps. Most of this session dealt with repairing this Tiefling Warforged Warlock, which not only involved a temporary character for Axel, (I’ve invoked the rule that the XP the backup character received also applies to what Axel will become) but also the return of one of my earlier characters: Julian Rolkhun. For the uninitiated, he’s a former Red Wizard of Thay who rebelled against Necromancy and became a designer of Faerun’s Warforged, working in Luskan as part of the Arcane Brotherhood. Think of a, if not benevolent at least less maniacal, Doctor Robotnik. Julian got contacted with one of his interns there (the backup character for Axel), who instructed the team to pick up Axel’s soul gem (Normally the product of one of Julian’s few remaining Necromatic spells: Trap the Soul) so they can carry it to Luskan so that Julian can install it into a new body.

But when they did it, I delivered a triple whammy to poor Axel: One, his original body vanished in a mini version of Hunger of Hadar, and Cthulhu might not be too happy of losing his warlock. Two: His replacement body can only be in the form of the four classes as listed in the Basic Rules! He chose Cleric, and so Axel is now a warforged that can generate healing abilities, thanks to a reactor that can gather up stray Arcane energy and convert it to more divine frequencies. Don’t ask me how Julian does that, I don’t know and I’m the fucking Dungeon Master.

The third whammy happened when I had him installed: The Warforged body is female.

And for a moment, I had that body get a quirk that it gets aroused when it goes near a dwarf.

After about a moment of crying foul, I had Julian adjust her. Now she’s got the hots for dragonborn.

Also, the party went and delivered a fourth whammy: They used the rest of the Nolzur’s Marvelous Pigments to make that female warforged body a female warforged anthro rabbit body!

Oooooh, this really has possibilities.

I closed the session with a surged of zombies running amok in the City of Sales, with a couple Zombie Dwarves thrown in for good measure. Julian recognized the activity as Thayan, but what’s that Dwarf with a Thundering Hammer symbol with them?

In recap:

Axel is now a Level 5 Female Warforged Rabbitfolk Cleric (Life Domain). If you need help with the character design, I’ll help you out there, Axel.

You have ran out of Nolzur’s Marvelous Pigments, so remove them from the treasure or equipment list.

The Farm is destroyed, and will be factored in next week’s Business Recap.

You managed to rescue Marcion and gained 15 Super Potions of Healing (heal up to Max Health plus 1 Temp HP)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *